Wednesday, February 07, 2007

I Would Like To Lose, Jonathan Mendoza

I would like to lose… I would like to lose… Honestly, I don't know where to begin. Being someone who was born with cerebral palsy, I've always dreamed, not of losing, but of gaining something. Gaining the freedom to run and run until it feels like flying, gaining the freedom to glide upon that shimmering coat of ice in the middle of winter.

Losing what I was born with would completely change my life. Sometimes I don't know if that's good or bad. My hunger for reading and my drive to write has always come from what I don't have; that seemingly unreachable goal.

In some ways my disability is a gift; something that makes me want to reach beyond my boundaries and ignore limitations. You see, even though I might be physically disabled, I've always pushed my mind to the limit, imagining what life would be like on the other side of the looking glass and striving to do the best with what I have.

I think that losing my disability would sap my drive. It might prevent me from looking and thinking outside the box, because there won't be a box anymore. I know I sound crazy, but losing my disability, would be like losing a part of me. Losing all the memories, and all the experiences I've had, tucked away with me in my little box world.

2 comments:

Mighty Mojo said...

Love you Jonathan. You are amazing, and thank you for reading this and being so open and candid for the freshmen. Your positivity is truly something to be envied and admired (yes, I do both, as if all of my time weren't already taken up with admiring and envying your WRITING...)

j

W Brown said...

Jonathan

I had the pleasure of sitting in Ms. Mayo's room as you read this to a freshmen class. your unique perspective and outlook on life is one of the treasures of our school community. Keep up the good work.