The Last Time you Saw Someone (or a not so depressing piece of work), Maya Orr

It was the first and last time I ever saw her. I'm still crossing my fingers that I'll never run into her again. She was an idiot. Seriously. She looked nice though - very pretty. I know this for a fact because some guy walked up to her and gave her this corny pick-up line. You know, the one about rearranging the alphabet to put u' and 'i' together? Though maybe he was on a dare or something. I don't know. Anyway, her response? "I thought they were already next to each other." She meant every word. She was totally clueless. I was a bit weirded out but didn't really care. I didn't know her. I didn't want to know her. Problem solved - except not. I was waiting for my best friend to arrive, and as if she had been waiting for this cue, she did arrive. She didn't see me at first, but she did see the clueless girl, walked towards her, hugged her (they knew each other!?) and when catching sight of my, made her way over, girl in tow.
"Hey, remember when I said I was going to bring a friend?" my friend asked. No, actually, my mouth began to form. "Yeah, so, this is her. Bridget, meet Maya. Maya, Bridget." Thanks for letting me answer oh dearest friend. With introductions over with, we headed for food, settling on a pizza place. Simple but a good choice. Or maybe it would've been had Bridget NOT taken twenty minutes to decide no, she didn't want pepperoni, she wanted mushroom and the pink Vitamin Water. Really? How long does it take to decide that? Then she took it a step further and the cash register (I swear, the cashier looked ready to kill himself - I couldn't blame him): "How much do two quarters and a dime worth again?" Oh, please spare me. Whatever. By the time she bought her slice, I was on line for a second one. Oh give me a break, I didn't have breakfast. No break was given. he new girl somehow thought that we had been bonded to sisterhood at our introduction and let all her thoughts fly out of her mouth the second she thought them. Unfortunately, each was insulting and/or dull-witted. She talked about how all the guys like her, they were all staring at her (yeah, because you're an idiot, I felt like shouting), how greasy the pizza was, and why did they put so much grease on the pizza? Then she went on to saying how I was lucky that I didn't care what other people think about me, so on and so forth. Argh! Would someone shut this girl up? Lovely lovely Diane, my knight(ess?) in shining armor, my best friend in the universe (even though she had been the one to introduce us in the first place) took control of the conversation, talking about more educated things, touching on politics and reasoning behind certain actions in not-so-political settings. Bridget had no words to say, looking incredibly dumbfounded (a Kodak moment for sure). Thank God for small miracles, huh? I don't know if I described it, but her voice, ugh. It was like...melted sugar over needles - way too sweet with a way of attacking the mind causing instant headaches, and don't let me get started on her laugh. Although I'd like (not) to give more examples of her stupidity, I think I've (blessedly) unconsciously blocked those memories since they were so traumatizing. I don't know how Diane ever became friend with her, but last I heard, she moved to California. Watch out Hollywood. No, seriously. Pick up and run away. Now.